Tag: family

  • My Love – 3 – Affection

    My Love – 3 – Affection

    Affection! How hurriedly has this love fled our homes in the hustle and bustle of these last days?

    Hardly a child will remember affectionate extended time with both father and mother at home. It is a great failure of our broken, worldly ‘christian’ families. How by our selfish quests for ‘happiness’ in the world ‘christians’ have forgotten not only the importance of our marriage vows, but also the affection and stability needed by our children for this essential love.

    The word for this love in Greek is storgēThis love is our natural affection of a parent toward our off-spring and the dependent children toward parents without whom they would not have been born and could not survive as God has intended.

    The relationship carries on into the extent of the lives of parent and child even well into adulthood and times when circumstance may dictate a child caring for their aging parent prior to death.

    Briefly consider the affection and nearness of the families of Noah, Abraham and Jacob (even when his son, Prince Joseph of Egypt, cared for all of the sons of Israel and their families).

    Read how near David remained in his affection, honor and relationship to his father Jesse. See how the families of the Priests and Prophets all lived together in one home or places near to one another as the faithful of God maintained the love and affection of community.

    Another antiquated use of this storge love is expressed by a people for their King (even if he ‘did evil in the eyes of the Lord.’) We do not get to choose this relationship of inequitable dependence.

    Our children must depend on and require the love and affection of their father and of their mother (and to a lesser extent, the people of their King, Queen, Governor, President or leader). A parent (or King) has duties of affection and responsibility toward each child (or subject).

    Look also to the application for widows in this. Look to the needs of their children. See the God-given affection of dependence on family, rather than independence of self-will.

    When Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead, Lazarus was not only a beloved friend but also responsible for his unmarried sisters, Mary and Martha.

    What wonderful long-term affection of one in need dependent on a family member to provide or care for them. It is the familial plight of children, widows and widowers, aging parents, handicapped children or siblings. Love provides the compassion they need.

    Is it not our God-given duty to love our children with the greatest affection?

    • Is your instant message, your text, your clever ‘fb share’ enough affection?
    • Is it enough for only a ‘single’ parent to manage this important love God expects from all of us?mom kissing infant

    dad embracing football sonhug grandmaamish men and boyswomen in kitchenblack familyfamily roomfamily hug

    Storge (per se) is not specifically used in the Greek New Testament; however this love and affection of family is well documented in many books of the Bible.

    The Apostle Paul uses a similar word as direction to those with charge of our church family for some who must submit as children of God as a dependent one of Christ’s body, His church. Please hear the appeal and responsibility for this love (storge) as instructed in Paul’s Letter to Titus, a leader in establishing the foundation of the church and family.

    Titus 2

    Teach Sound Doctrine
    But as for you, teach what accords with sound doctrine. 2 Older men are to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love, and in steadfastness. 3 Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good,

    4 and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.

    6 Likewise, urge the younger men to be self-controlled. 7 Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, 8 and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us.

    We ought to see a hierarchical dichotomy in this instruction between the expected mature behavior of the older men and older women of the church, in contrast to their loving responsibility to train the younger women and younger men in the will and ways of Christ Jesus our Lord.

    The instruction in the King James Version describes these differences with serious gravity.

    That the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith, in charity, in patience. The aged women likewise…

    Would this not also imply a similar duty and affection for the husband and wife of our Christian homes?

    And to these instructions Paul adds (as just reason for the older women): … that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;

    How are we doing with that, men and woman of Christ’s church, in our Christian homes? Are we, as mature Christians, ‘teachers of good things?’

    We can be certain that our affection, teaching and guidance in the love of the Lord in our homes is much needed in this 21st century. (If you don’t believe it, just ask nearly any of our ‘christian’ youth.)

    These young men and young women so depend on us and look to us; yet so often as parents and as their mentors of the church we ignore our teens and fail our youth.

    Hear once more (in the KJV) what Paul instructs the older women and note once more that it is OUR responsibility to teach them (again, a familial dependent love):

    That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,

    To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

     (I have added links to definitions in the Greek, in some instances root words, and always other uses of the same Greek word in New Testament scripture for your own study.)

    Again, I ask us: has this love, this affection been diluted and nearly lost in our Christian homes?

    On a personal note, I must confess to our son and our daughters how miserably I have failed in this love and affection so needed in our own now-broken christian home; as I confess to my wife by our vows before the Lord my great failure to show the love of the Blood of Jesus to her and His compassion for the struggles of my own wife in the Lord. For this (like so many broken christian marriages and families) I am truly sorry that WE are no witness of example to the church and to the world.

    I pray that the Lord and your personal prayer and study of scripture will convict you in those areas of love where Christ Jesus would have you grow, love even more and be blessed.

    Pray also for me, my wife and our broken family – our grown children, yet in need of compassion.

    To be continued

  • Prayer List

    Prayer List

    May our Lord and Savior, Christ Jesus, who we worship with the Father and Holy Spirit, kneed our impenitent hearts of stone into soft sands of His overflowing love. Amen.

    To begin, let’s not forget that God is a Person who cares about us. In Christ Jesus we have a personal relationship with the Living God!

    And by our intimate relationship with the God of Heaven, a spirit to Spirit relationship the Bible describes as most like that of a wife to her husband, we have the intimacy of the love of God and the ear of His loving heart.

    Who, then, do we pray for? (and to whom do we pray?)

    Can we begin any relationship without attention given to the intimacy of love between the one who asks and the person we would have answer?

    IF you ignore the loving question of your loved one, how is it that you ask God and expect to receive an answer? His is an even more intimate relationship, not unlike that of husband and his wife.

    Did I say, ‘His wife?’

    Yes. Unless we are submitted to Jesus Christ as our Lord, He cannot be the Bridegroom of our hope. What a shame that He would say to you, betrothed christian, “I never knew you.”

    Prayer is most personal with the Person of God!

    If we pray privately, which I pray you do and will do so even more, the intimacy will give you more understanding of His will, alongside your dedicated devotion to the scripture of God’s written and living word. (I am too often guilty of a lack of intimacy in my prayer with God, a lack of time and commitment.)

    Privately, (& trying to praise and thank the lover of my soul) I ask God my Lord for what I need, showing me what I need rather than what I want which is not in His will. I guess that I would say that I NEED God to sustain me in my prayer for my own heart-felt needs.

    church prayer listCorporately, that is in praying as part of our church or a prayer group, I find that prayers like my deepest prayers to God are sorely neglected by most of those asking ONLY for prayers for others, not confessing our own deepest hurts, needs, and desires for God’s love and the love of our Christian community.

    We border on hypocrisy in our false, hopeful faces before our brothers and sisters in Christ.

    If we only ask prayer for our family, friends, loved ones and others, while hiding the depths of our brokenness from those who would, along with God, sustain us in prayer; is our prayer request not disingenuous, an easier substitute for our own heart-felt needs for love and prayer?

    as a husband

    Our God is a God of relationships – loving relationships. We dare not neglect His expected intimacy in our prayer relationships in which we would intercede for others by our own prayers.

    I pray first for my wife, then for our three (grown) children. I try to do this more than daily. This has always been my first priority of prayer.

    I try also to pray for my Christian family, as if they are nearer to me than my own biological family; for through Christ in eternity, they are also adopted alongside me into His body, through the Blood of His Holy Sacrifice of love for all of our sins.

    Pray first for the person. Pray then for their need.

    I try to bow my head and thank God in prayer before I eat or enter into some activity of the day. (I seek to do this both privately and publicly as witness.) This is not so much about the person, as it is for our immediate need. For example, my wife once insisted on praying for our safety most times we left home in the car. Our security and safety are needs, of course. Yet the soul of a loved one is certainly more important to God and to me than any thing I might ask for a trip across town.

    girls at slotsIs it right that one who claims Jesus as “Lord,” should pray for help in winning in the world so that they might live comfortable in Christ?

    lottery prayer filterDo you pray that you or someone in your family will ‘hit the Lottery’ and help answer your unanswered prayers? Do you pray for a blessing from God, nearer than the blessing God already sent for you to have and to hold?

    We know the true answer in Christ.

    Yet is not forgiveness and grace so necessary in dealing with the struggles and sins of our most beloved ones as they trustingly share the concerns of their own heart?

    The false face of our prayer requests (sometimes)

    Some of the sins of our lives and struggles of our flesh remain even more as anathema to ‘church’ prayers. Who will hear our cries to God, a crying out for help, love, forgiveness and grace; cries from some of our beloved Christian sisters and brothers?

    Dare you even mention one of these at ‘church?’

    Dare your brother or sister even mention: an abortion, adultery, a homosexual experience, pornography or any other such ‘christian’ taboo?

    Dare any of our Christian youth even mention the passions and indiscretions which most commonly lead to the pregnancies the church must hide? For that matter, dare one divorced, widowed or unmarried for a time ask the help of a brother (sister) in prayer for the same?

    Dare any ‘grace-faced christian’ even reveal these struggles and prayers to a pastor, let alone a dear friend of the church? Again, let us be careful not to judge too harshly.

    You know why you put on the mask of hypocrisy.

    Do you not suspect that those you love in Christ are not threatened by the judgment of your rejection?

    How difficult it is for us to not judge (for even Jesus would not judge).  I am guilty. May the Lord have mercy on me, for I endure the punishment of His curse. Yet I include loved ones guilty of each or these sins just mentioned and more in my prayers to God.

    If God can forgive them (should they turn to His love), how can I not also pray for their repentance and return to God through the same Blood of Christ Jesus shed for me?

    David committed adultery with a woman and murdered her husband! Yet when the man after God’s own heart finally repented, David prayed:

    Against you, you only, have I sinned
    and done what is evil in your sight,
    so that you may be justified in your words
    and blameless in your judgment. – Psalm 51

    How difficult it is for us to reprove in love – give a Christian sinner the help for which they have asked God in their own deepest prayer. How difficult to love AND forgive those most dear to us.

    Yet by the Blood of Christ, God has covered even our sins of today (in addition to those long past).

    Blessed is the one whose transgression is forgiven,
    whose sin is covered. – Psalm 32:1

    The revelation of God’s love for us is in Christ Jesus, who died on the Cross and IS risen! He hears our pray. Jesus hears our plea. He is revealed to us. We are freed by his blood.

    Amazingly, by his blood, we are made His Priests and His intercessors!

    Revelation  1:5 … and from Jesus Christ the faithful witness, the firstborn of the dead, and the ruler of kings on earth. To him who loves us and has freed us from our sins by his blood.

    To him who loves us and has freed us from our sins by his blood 6 and made us a kingdom, priests to his God and Father, to him be glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.

    Help us, God. Help us, beloved believer. We all need prayer. Allow us, as His Priests to intercede for those near and dear to our hearts and our souls.

    Who is important in your life?

    Are you praying for your VIP in humble humility to God and asking your loving brothers and sisters in Christ to stand by you in prayer for their needs?

    Who is most import in God’s will?
    • A husband to his wife &
    • A wife to her husband.
    • BOTH parents to every child.
    • a loving father to all of his children, at home and by example in Christ,
    • a nurturing mother to all of her children, at home and by example in Christ.

    We all FAIL in some of these most important relationships God expects from us in His love, don’t we?

    So why not ask God, with whom we have a personal relationship in prayer, to help us to do what is right in His will and not our own?

    And why not ask our most intimate of friends, Christian brothers (sisters), who care for us in Christ deeply, to support us in prayer for these same relational needs for the VIP’s of our daily life? Sometimes the difficulty of these struggles of life are more appropriate for a small group of believers or even one life-minded brother (or sister) in the Lord, than for the prayer list of the entire church (often as fodder for speculation and gossip).

    It seems the ‘perfect christians’ must go to some other church.

    OR perhaps some we know just hide behind their masks of Christ’s perfection.

    Let us, dearly beloved of Christ Jesus, love them as He has loved us.

    Let us bow down before the Lord our God in great humility, with hearts overflowing in love and pouring forth forgiveness, through our prayers for for the family of Christ Jesus. Amen.

    How may I pray for you, adding you to my personal prayer list?

    Please comment. If you would like any of our readers to also pray for you, please share your personal prayer needs with us.

    (IF you would rather have your request remain private, please begin your comment with the word, ‘Private,’ and I will not post it publicly.)

    Pray also for me, that I might return to a purer committed faith in God to both hear and answer my ceaseless prayers for my most beloved.

    Roger Harned, author and site administrator

  • Prayer Warrior?

    Prayer Warrior?

    NO! I am no prayer warrior. So what did I do? I doubled the size of my prayer list.

    I identify with Simon Peter.

    … he fell down at Jesus’ knees, saying, “Depart from me, for I am a sinful man, O Lord.” – Luke 5:8b

    I understand the great remorse and unworthiness expressed by Saul of Tarsus found in Paul’s first letter to the church at Corinth:

    For I am the least of the apostles, unworthy to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God. 1 Corinthians 15:9

    He is the same Apostle who instructs the church at Thessaloniki: 16 Rejoice always, 17 pray without ceasing, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 19 Do not quench the Spirit. – 1 Th 5

    and

    25 Brothers, pray for us.

    No. I am no ‘prayer warrior.’ Look at my life and see how ineffective my many fervent prayers have been in the lives of those I love most, even in my own family, even in our marriage bed. God’s great silence seems more than, ‘Not yet.’ Job’s call of ‘answer me’ seems unheeded in my life. Though I await the storm clouds billowing and the Voice of Righteousness to ask me, ‘Who are you to ask this prayer of me again and again and again?!’ – though I cower beneath the broom tree and hide in the press of life’s defeats, I pray. I pray for these and I pray for me.

    And I will pray for you.

    prayer requestJust ‘Comment‘ and ask.

    (I read & moderate all Comments.  If you prefer not to post publicly, just begin your comment & prayer request, ‘Private.’ )

    – Roger Harned, author & site administrator

    To be continued… 

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